ᴋᴀʟʏᴘꜱᴏ

I have a new trait lately, and I can’t quite tell if it’s good or somehow bad. I can’t dream about anything. There used to be so many things that would excite and motivate me. Even when reading a simple job posting, if it was suitable for me, I’d start dreaming about it. Sometimes, I’d be so excited I couldn’t sit still that day. But now, I don’t dream about anything. I don’t feel enthusiastic about anything. It’s actually been like this for a long time; it just took me a while to realize it. When I say it out loud, I know it sounds like a bad thing. After all, dreams and excitement are what give people the desire to live, to some extent. Yet, strangely, it doesn’t feel bad—at least not for now. I was so exhausted from dreaming and getting my hopes up that now, not feeling anything at all feels like a vacation. Admittedly, it’s a bit of a bad vacation. I’ve become a numb person—yes, I accept that too. Still, at least for now, I’m not dealing with disappointment. I feel completely fr...